Ubud, 6 July 2023 — When a transformational conversation takes less time than you think.

Story

It happened this week. In Grow3Leaders, our community of practice for professionals wanting to become trusted leaders, we kicked off the July theme about coaching as a leadership style. Specifically, we will be practicing short coaching styles that take as little as 5, 10, and 20 minutes and can be integrated easily into a workday.

Notably, a team of researchers at Case Western Reserve University led by Prof Richard Boyatzis found that a 15 to 20-minute coaching conversation can work wonders for a positive transformation in work and life. Making these conversations a daily habit in the workplace can ignite the spark of positive change in the lives of people around you, with hope, compassion, mindfulness, and playfulness. 

For me, ever since receiving Leader as Coach training in 2008, I have guided hundreds of clients on how to engage in frequent coaching moments in the workplace. From feedback, we heard that such moments could transform a colleague’s life in 20 minutes or less. That feedback inspired me to experiment with more short coaching-style conversations that take very little time. That’s what I’d like to share about today.

Challenge

While the benefits of short coaching conversations are clear, especially for time-poor leaders, doing them well is a challenge. Let’s break that down into three specific behaviors to learn and master. Since these behaviors are different from the way we show up at work with our ‘expert’ mindset, they require that we change our mindset and ‘build muscle’ in frequent practice.

The first behavioral challenge is to give our full attention to the colleague in the conversation. That’s easier said than done, first because we tend to be full of our own good ideas and intentions, and second because attention spans tend to be short nowadays. Moreover, keep in mind that your colleague will know it when you are actively listening with your full attention or just hearing them while your brain is on something else.

The second challenge is even harder. Until you tame your advice monster—and yes, we all have one—you are actually withholding the benefits of the coaching conversation from your colleague. The third challenge is also tough. It is to suspend your judgment and focus on appreciating and acknowledging your colleague for whatever ideas and actions they generate during the conversation, even if they differ from what you would do in their situation.

Question

When you step into the Leader as Coach role and start to have short coaching-style conversations with your colleagues, the first thing to do is to flip a mental switch in your head to activate your coaching mindset. This is difficult at first. However, over time, with frequent practice, this will become second nature.

Now to my question for this week. What do you think can be the outcomes of a successful short coaching conversation when you deliver it well? It may be more than you think! I’m looking forward to reading your response, with a great deal of curiosity.

With the rising popularity of coaching in the workplace, opportunities are growing to discover, practice, and master this style of leadership. Doing so will help to build a coaching culture in today’s workplaces that will empower growth, performance, and well-being, allowing everyone to flourish. It’s my vision to bring that into reality. Are you on board with me for that?

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