Manila, 11 December 2019 — To lurk or to lead is a decision with a big payoff.

For many people, December is a time to reflect on your highlights of the past year and explore what you want to focus on in the new year.

Overwhelmed

If you, like many, experience a sense of being overwhelmed at this time, such a reflection can pose a challenge, as it may feel that you have too much going on in your life, and too much information (TMI) to make sense of where you are going. Does that sound at all familiar?

Your busyness will likely include being a member of several teams and a host of online discussions, forums, and groups. No wonder that it may sometimes seem like too much to handle.

Oftentimes, the solution is found in the motto that less is more. In my experience, that definitely applies to the number of online groups you want to be involved in.

I once received a request to join from someone who was a member of 250 Facebook groups. Imagine what that would be like. Perhaps you can, even if your number of groups is much smaller.

Researchers point out that in most online groups, the majority of members are lurkers. This term, as explained by Techopedia.com, is used to describe the behavior of internet users who, rather than participate, only passively observe information and do not reveal information about himself or herself.

Lurkers, Likers, and Leaders

A smaller number of users in the group can be called likers. They enjoy consuming what they find and like what others write in posts and comments, yet rarely contribute posts to share about their own experiences and themselves.

Finally, there is a small number of leading members—let’s call them leaders—who actively engage and contribute to the group, because they have reached out and developed relationships and feel a sense of shared responsibility. These leaders also discovered how their active participation brings benefits to themselves and others in the group.

That’s what research tells us about the usual composition of online groups, and the behaviors we can observe in most groups. Are you with me so far?

Obviously, it will be challenging or even impossible to be a leader in many groups. Come to think of it, perhaps there is no need for that anyway. Why is that?

The Lurk Like or Lead diagram can help us understand.

There is a lesson to be learned from the 70-20-10 rule of leadership development. It says that 70% of our leadership growth comes from taking on challenges and that only 10% comes from gaining more knowledge.

Being a member of too many groups can, therefore, be counterproductive. It might give you little or no benefit for what truly matters in life. Too much emphasis information and little else.

That’s why the motto of less is more is worth reflecting on.

And what about the remaining 20%, you ask? It’s about the importance of building relationships that bring you and others forward, like with peers, mentors, and coaches.

Behavior Matters

Where are you in the groups you are a member of? Do you behave like a lurker, a liker, or a leader?

Interestingly, the dictionaries tell us that lurking has a dark side, like when danger or a threat lurks. I believe this is apt for the nonproductive behavior of lurking in a group without advancing to become a liker and then a leader.

Behaving like a lurker kills the benefit you—and others—get when you would participate fully, give it your best, and enjoy the growth that comes from that experience. 

So, on balance, why not spend some time at the end of this year to review where you want to be in the groups that you are a member of. Put an end to any lurking behavior and decide to show up as a leader in the group, for the benefit of yourself and your fellow group members.

What’s more, don’t waste your time staying in groups where you don’t contribute and take action. And in the groups you decide to stay in, graduate from behaving like a lurker who compares, to a liker to starts choosing and sharing, and on to a leader who commits to grow and contribute to the group.

Too much information can be distracting and give you a false impression. It’s worth remembering that, to grow as a leader, it’s not the number of ideas you get that counts. That’s just part of the 10%.

What really matters is the learning and experience you get from taking action (the 70%) and then to share those experiences with others you have a committed relationship within the group (the 20%).

To use another metaphor, the learning experience you need is what you get from using the Bamboo process of leadership development, as opposed to the Banana approach of seeking instant gratification. It’s the Bamboo experience you want to be after to become an effective leader. Running from one banana (or shiny object) to another doesn’t help.

When we created a community of leaders, we deliberately took the knowledge about lurkers, likers, and leaders in groups into account. Rather than focus on providing a lot of information, of which most people already have too much, we chose to design the community around a challenge.

Our priority is on learning from experience and to do so collaboratively rather than only individually. The challenge is to Grow 3 Leaders to influence a change together in your workplace. To do that, lurking doesn’t help.

If the motto of less is more appeals to you and you are ready to reduce the clutter of TMI in your life to become an effective leader, our community of leaders may be a good fit for you. Visit Grow3Leaders to request your invitation.

Joining is free of charge—and not free of commitment. Decide to lead rather than to lurk.